Dissecting the norm
When I was a little girl, I remember being told quite often that I should be aware of how revealing my wardrobe is, how much makeup I’m wearing, or how intense I am behaving. People would say that it is distracting to boys when they are in school.
Sadly, I never heard anyone try to teach a boy not only that they should respect women and look to them for intellectual guidance(since it’s scientifically proven that the female brain matures faster than the male), but that they shouldn’t be viewing us as distracting sexual objects.
As a result of this consistently misguided message, as women we are now viewed as a trophy or accessory for a man. Other terms that come to mind are “bitchy”, “too much”, “bossy”, “confrontational”, or “stubborn”. Ironically, when men present the same behavior that usually gives us these titles, they are said to be “determined”, “a leader”, “well spoken”, or “hard-working”.
Gender Discrimination Represented
A consistent example of women being negatively targeted in our society is shown most prevalent in our female celebrities. In interviews they often receive questions about the outfit they are wearing, the fitness regime they follow, what diet they are restricted too for maintaining their figure, or my favorite, “are you dating anyone new”. They are rarely asked about their career goals and their opinions on current social issues.
One of my favorite interviews was with Simone Biles. When the interviewer commented on her lack of smiling during routines, Biles responded with “smiling doesn’t win you gold medals”. It was in this interview that Biles was able to briefly break the lens that is typically looked through when reviewing a woman. We are beautiful and elegant, but we are also powerful, determined, disciplined, and honorable.
Another popular interview that has been referenced frequently since it’s viewing was with Rihanna.
“What are you looking for in a man?”
“I’m not looking for a man, let’s start there”.
Female celebrities are constantly bombarded on the red carpet, being asked about their romantic life or if they will be “leaving with lots of men tonight”. The key focus is always about who they will be the trophy for, not that they are their own trophy.
It’s a man's world. . . . .So let’s make it ours too
We are living in a world defined and constructed by men, from the language, to the ground we walk on, yet they are utterly confused to find us questioning everything around us. In a global society dominated by men, women are often criticized when doing something that was assumed to only be possible by a man.
Every success or “power-move” beyond a man's comfort level is questioned, every opinion verbalized in an important room is critiqued, and every social step-forward is categorized as a “female revolution of empowerment”, since any progress from zero is applaudable.
We shouldn’t be settling for minor improvements in our system and we shouldn’t have to answer to every man who interrogates our purpose in the field that he generally occupies. We have normalized our whispers as a way of accommodating men and avoiding the offensive titles that they have given us.
Since it’s been made brutally obvious that men don’t have any agenda to flip the conversation, it’s time that rather than adapting to our gender exclusive environment, we counteract their close-minded reality with the truth of what being a woman truly means.
We live in a world paved for men. Although women have made great leaps in upheaving this pavement, we still have a long way to go. Don't forget the beauty and elegance within your mind that makes you a woman. Most importantly, don’t forget to speak your mind unapologetically. No more whispers.
Honorable Mention . . .
Lady Gaga: “If I was a guy, and I was sitting here with a cigarette in my hand grabbing my crotch and talking about how I make music because I love fast cars and girls, you’d call me a rockstar. But when I do it in my music and in my videos, because I’m a female, because I make pop-music, you’re judgmental and you say that it’s distracting. I’m just a rockstar.
Comments